Current mood:

aggravated

FUCKERRRS, I WISH I WAS GOING TO HOMECOMING.

DAMN.

Well, now to something thats really been bugging me lately.

This is to all my "OLD FRIENDS" and my "NEW FRIENDS" i guess you could say.

Ok. now. i probably will never stop hearing this from any of you. but seriously, no offense, SHUT UP! I'm sick of constantly hearing how i've "changed". im sorri people.

BUT I'M GROWING UP!!!!  I cant help that. i dont know about any of you but i DON'T want to be stuck in the 8th grade for the rest of my life. I'm in high school. I'm maturing. I'm sorri if you can't handle that. I'm not going to be that little girl who dressed in black all the time and was best friends with a hardcore metal head girl. There's nothing wrong with that little hardcore metal head girl or anything. But that's not ME. i can't compare myself to someone like her. And I cant PRETEND to be her when i really find that's not who i really am. I'm discovering myself more and more everyday. I'm making new friends. You're just going to have to accept that. Of course I'm changing. WE ALL ARE! And don't sit there and act as if we aren't. Because that is just really fucking stupid. I really do want to make something out of my life. I'm doing it now more than ever. I would still love to be close with some of my "old friends" as people call themselves. But here's my thing:

IF YOU DONT SHOW RESPECT TOWARDS ME, SHOW EVEN AN INTEREST IN BEING MY FRIEND, OR ANYTHING ALONG THE LINES OF A "FRIENDSHIP", DON'T EXPECT TO GET THAT FROM ME IN RETURN. BECAUSE I'M NOT GOING TO PUT OUT THE EFFORT IF I WON'T GET ANY IN RETURN.

Taryn& Sarah, The "Metal Heads", or High School, aren't what changed me. As much as you want to believe those are the reasons why I've changed, then fucking believe it. I don't care what you think. But don't start making up dumb ass reasons to explain why we haven't been the best of friends to make yourself feel better. If maybe you actually took the time to talk to me and maybe see what's going on in my life, then you'd understand. I have actually been through a good amount of shit in the past 4-5 months. More happened in those months then what has happened in the past 3 years before that. So don't point fingers before you know the truth. And from what happened, my whole view on things has expanded. I view things now in such a different way then I ever have. I LOVE the way I view them now then I ever have.

Apart of life is accepting changes in yourself and the people around you willingly. I haven't gotten any of that from my "OLD FRIENDS." So I gave up on you. And sometimes you people wonder why shit happens. You're completely oblivious to what's going on around you. Just like 8th grade. So instead of being like the rest of you, I'm going to grow up. I don't care if you have a problem with it either. I'm not going to be like the rest of you. I'm in High School now. Not Middle School anymore.

♥